it shall always be

Life's ever so contradicting.

That's it for me for the time being. A few months back, mood swings, frustration is all that was clouding me. At last when the prayers answered, I have this mixed feeling inside me now. Nevertheless, spending 2 months staying with another family truly brings me warmth inside out. First, I get to be with the boyfriend all the time. Seeing him off to work, waiting for him to come home. That's my daily routine. Well, part of it. Now that Im leaving for home (even for a few days!), its all sappy once more. Moreover, with the rostered schedule for the both of us, Im skeptical about how often we could see each other later. Yes, I admit that indeed Im a pessimist. Living together with someone who's already a part of the family, in which being apart seems so grey. How I wish this wont come sooner.

Sometimes, one is too busy getting on with their daily activities and its not until when one sat down to ponder around, only when life's just too precious. Day by day, it passes by. Days to weeks and to months. Without realizing, I've been slacking for nearly 10 months now. Ah~ life's truly a bliss. For me, its definitely the other way around as Im mostly painstakingly trying to fill up my day with what to do, who to meet, yada yada and now that the REAL thing finally starts sinking in, Im equally depressed as I was before. Life! As contradicting as it could be. To begin with, I havent even started packing yet for home later at 11am, hoping that time could slow down. This is how denial I am right now, hoping that I could turn back time and relieve those moments back again. Every week, I only look forward to the boyfriend's off day. That's when we could really go out and just forget about everything else. Being the considerate girlfriend *ahem* sometimes, things dont work out according to plan as its unevitable. With the workload and the amount of hours put in, one would surely hope to sleep all day long and do nothing! Its all about give and take. Tolerance's the key here. Nevertheless, I sure did had some fun time with sweetie. He's a small kid at heart and never fails to irritate me regardless in which teasing each other everyday's the way we amused ourselves. Welcome to my relationship where every small detail counts. It may not be all rosy as every couple do have their own ups and downs BUT I tend to remember those happy moments of ours. =)